My boyfriend and I broke up recently and I just want to get some stuff off my chest. First of all, I'd like to say, I'm glad. I mean, I'm SO glad. There are so many things I didn't like about him. Where do I even begin?
For starters, he'd never clean up after himself. Like, he'd never wash his dishes. He'd just throw them away. And he'd never sweep the floor. He'd just turn on the ceiling fan. And he'd never vaccum. He'd just leave crumbs on the carpet. Presumably for later. For me to clean up later, I mean.
I sure don't miss his messes. He made messes everywhere. In the bathroom. In the kitchen. On my stomach. He was so messy.
And he drank a lot. I guess that was his way of showing me how miserable and thirsty he was.
I do miss the little things about my ex, though. Like his pinky finger in my butt. He always could tell if I had a fever. No tricking that guy. He has a very sensitive pinky finger.
Even though my boyfriend and I had our problems, I guess if I had everything to do over again, I'd still do it the same. Except next time, I'd buy paper plates.