Friday, July 27, 2007

HANGIN' OUT IN DUBLIN

I'm in Dublin and the weather here is more bi-polar than my most disturbed family member. It's sunny for five minutes and then cold and raining. And like that, on and on.

I did my first show last night at International Bar -- what a cool place. The show is run by Aidan Bishop, who is American but has been in Ireland for awhile now and seems to be doing pretty well here with his charming New York accent and his adorable face, not to mention some good jokes. It's reminiscent of NYC's Rififi, but the place has probably been there for 300 years.

The venue was packed solid. If there were any more people in the place, they would have had to sit on the stage -- oh, wait, they did. Each side of the stage was lined with 5 people, which was...a resourceful use of space. The Irish are so brave!

There wasn't even enough room for performers to watch the show. They had peep holes so we could see the show through the wall. So many faces had been smooshed up against that wall, there were imprints of faces worn into the old paint.

I love Irish people! I did some of my brashest material and the Irish took it like troopers. After the show, I sold a bunch of CDs and even sold some of my fancy new "My Pussy Is Magic" panties, I mean, "knickers" to the ladies. Some men even tried to buy some, but I didn't bring any man panties with me to the show.

Tonight I will play at 7 PM at the Iveagh Gardens / Bud Light Festival show and then I'll go back to the International Bar at 9.

OK, see you later. I'm going to go get emotionally fucked with by the weather for awhile.

Saturday, July 21, 2007

UK'S RUSSELL BRAND SHOW



I am going to London with The Trachtenburg Family Slideshow Players for the first two weeks of September after my debuting my show, "Songs About Vaginas" at the Edinburgh Festival this August, so I thought I'd contact some people in London and set some other shows to sing songs about vaginas and other juicy topics at, besides the shows I'm doing at Soho Theater with the Trachtenburgs. I wrote Russell Brand a letter asking him to consider putting me on his BBC radio show. I have to do these things myself, because I don't have a manager to do this kind of crap for me, and my record label doesn't really do this stuff, either. I was pretty glad to get a very quick response, asking me to contact the show.

I tried to call London but since I can't make long distance calls from my home line (a safe guard set up since I often leave town for chunks of time and have other people staying here) and since I can't make international calls on my Sprint PCS phone (though I do pay for that feature through Sprint PCS -- they truly suck a cold hot dog) I was having a little trouble getting in touch with them. I bought a calling card and tried that, too, but the number I was trying to call kept saying it was an incorrect number. I was dialing the wrong country code, thick American that I am.

In the meantime, a friend emailed me and told me that Russell Brand had read the letter I wrote to him over the air on his show and asked his listeners to tell him whether or not I should be on the show. Well.

Apparently, I am supposed to recommend that people contact Russell's show and tell them to either put me on or not. I found the whole thing to be a little silly and wasn't even going to get involved. But then I learned that some London bitches have spear-headed a campaign to keep me OFF the show. They found it offensive that I call my music "Dirty Folk Rock". Hmmm. That lit a spark under my hairy vagina and now I'm really steamed. I'm gonna those crooked toothed bitches that they're messing with the wrong princess of pervy ditties.

So who's with me?

Friends, strangers, weirdos, political people, CIA agents, dog walkers, other musicians, haters, beraters, elaters, waiters, skaters, placaters, darth vaders (people who dress up like him at festivals...?), and really anyone else who is something that rhymes with "aters" or literally any single other person who gives even half a crap or no crap at all...if you think it'd be fun, funny, stupid, or just otherwise feel like getting involved, LET'S DO THIS! Let's show this "Russell Brand", if that's his "real name", how we support our perverse musicians in NYC! And let's show those London hags that it's called "Dirty Folk Rock" for a reason!

Or something.

Here's the link you can go to to hear my letter segment being read on his show:

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=U8V887YW

otherwise you can use the "listen again" feature, I am told. I think it's somewhere over here...

http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio2/shows/brand/

And if you wanna get in on this retarded action, here is his email address, phone number and text. Do this today, as the show is tonight. Maybe you'll be live on the show, if you give a turd about that kind of thing.

CONTACT RUSSELL BRAND'S SHOW:

russell.brand@bbc.co.uk
Call: 0500 288 291
Text: 88291
www.myspace.com/RussellBrand

And...um...thanks!

For more information about Russell Brand, who actually has been up to some interesting things, as always, I suggest "googling" him!

GOOGLE RUSSELL BRAND

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

NEW POST ON BETTER BOYFRIEND BLOG!!!

My sick, twisted, mentally deranged boyfriend is at it again! I've updated my better boyfriend blog with his latest email to a girl who he keeps writing to and calling and promising that when he and I break up, he is going to have sex with her...against her will or not is left to be determined!

Good luck, Christopher / aka "the most honest man on earth!"


www.betterboyfriend.blogspot.com

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

NEW!Jessica Delfino Merch made by me! "My Pussy Is Magic" Ladies & Men's Undies! $10 each, or 3 for $25.

Briefs and boxers, (male and female) available in a variety of shapes, colors and sizes.

Other slogans available as well, such as "You don't lick my pussy right" and "Once a month for a week, I bleed from my vagina", and I even have a few pairs with photos of my face on them. Be the first person on your block to wear my visage on your nether regions.

Email jessdelfino@yahoo.com or paypal $10 & your size and address to jessdelfino@yahoo for yours today.




"PINK MAGIC"


"CAMO-TOE"


"LICK-RITE G-STRING"


"PERIOD PANTIES"

Saturday, July 7, 2007



GOOD TIMES TONITE!

The starting sounds of summer are happening at the Gene Frankel
Underground Sat, July 7th @ 10:30PM as Groove MaMa Ink Presents:

MaMa's Monthly Music Fix

Featuring:
Jessica Delfino (Comedic)



Dalton Ridenhour and Band (Jazz)
The Fools (Acoustics)
and
Reggie Watts (Beatbox)
Hosted by: Rosie Rebel



WHEN: SAT, JULY 7TH @ 10:30PM
WHERE: GENE FRANKEL UNDERGROUND
24 BOND ST (BOWERY/LAFAYETTE)
COST: $12 INCLUDES A DRINK
RSVP (Seating Limited):INFO@GROOVEMAMAINK.COM 212-252-5341 OR

***This is a theatre : LATECOMERS CAN NOT BE SEATED***

Sunday, July 1, 2007

FLYING WITCHES!!

This is so funny. Interesting, they say "she" a lot. VERY interesting, indeed!

NOTE: It turned out to be a bunch of balloons...I wanted it so badly to actually be flying witches.


RACHEL TRACTENBURG SEEKS A SONG FOR HER SHOW!!

Seeking someone to write a theme song for Rachel Trachtenburg's Morning Show which she will be doing in Edinburgh for the month of August.

Details: It's a kid's "morning" show. Rachel will be doing arts & crafts, cooking, ukelele songs, and more. There will be friends visiting her on-stage, puppets that "turn into real people", and other little surprises in the style of Rachel Trachtenburg.

No need to make a fancy recording, just give your song idea on a tape to Tina and Rachel. Email slideshowplayers@yahoo.com to work out giving them your tape. Rachel will be singing it and recording it herself.

Please get your song ideas in before July 14th!