BACK FROM MY TREACHEROUS, HARROWING JOURNEY!
Did you miss me? Anyone? Hello? (Hello? Hello?) Is there anybody in there?
I am back from being on tour with Lisa Suckdog and what a whirlwind adventure it was! I've summarized it into a poem to keep from having to write paragraph after paragraph recounting fascinating detail after scintillating detail of the whole ding dang ordeal.
LISA SUCKDOG TOUR, CONDENSED, IN POEM FORM
by Jessica Delfino
LA was smelly - I sold 10 cds
The satanists came and some girl attacked Lisa
My old ex bf Brian stopped by the show
we slept at a cool chick named Val's on the floor
SF was happy - we showed up just in time
some fucked up audience chick sang a song about Lisa's behind
The satanists showed up with a vial of their poopy
I busked on the street and I was recognized
Portland was smoky - I damn divad out
asked those yuppies to put their damn cigarettes out
I pissed on the pizza and some chick joined in
Then went to the party of a gay lesbian
Seattle was cozy - an intimate show
The Trachtenburgs came and brought joy to my day
Nothing much happened at that show of note
that night at a guy named Christofurry's I stayed
The tour was successful - the ride home did blow
drove home in a car, it took four full long days
had to stop due to blizzards and some tornados
first thing I heard back in NY was the sirens ablaze
I'm working on a tour diary journal project with accompanying tape, not a ding dang CD. I'm very excited about this project. I kept a detailed, silly journal and kept little mementos within it which I will transcribe and publish. The tape will have songs from the CDs and tapes we listened to and also some recorded dialog, specifically a conversation with Dame Darcy about the Apocalypse and a hilarious story she recounted about the time she stole her ex-boyfriend's car called "The Tale of the Squirrely Jack Rabbit and the Retarded Buffalo."
You can reserve a copy by emailing me at email@example.com. They will cost $7.