Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Tonight: A "Dirty 30"
at Googie's Lounge
Ludlow & Stanton, NYC
8:30 PM / FREE

Ya know, when some people say things, they don't really mean them. Like when some men say, "I love you", they don't really mean it. Or when some women say, "Size doesn't matter", they really don't mean it. And when some people say a show is going to be "off the wall" or "crazy" or "dirty", what they mean is, it's totally PG-13, at worst. No swears, no nip, clean as a nursery rhyme.

But when I say my songs are dirty, I mean it. I mean dirty. Filthy! Songs about vaginas (oohh! the filthy holes that they are!), songs about penises, songs about body parts and body fluids, all the things that television hates presenting unless it's something a man wrote.

I've been writing folk songs for years because that's what I like to write and growing up in the hills of Maine is what inspired me -- and guess who hangs out in the hills of Maine? Folky people. They are also known as "hippies" etc. So, yes, I listened to a lot of Joni Mitchell and Gordon Lightfoot and also, 2 Live Crew, so when you put those things together, whadda ya got? Ya got Dirty Folk Rock. I really love writing dirty ditties, it is fun, freeing, ridiculous and has taken me around the world. Do you know I totally could have had sex with a lot of salacious famous people if I weren't such a nice girl? I really should have, because they probably would tell people that we did anyway. But ANYWAY --

I will be performing a classic set of dirty ditties tonight at 8:30 at Googie's Lounge, which is above the Living Room on Ludlow Street, right next door to Piano's and just two doors down from the corner of Ludlow and Stanton Street. The show is free, and it's a cute space. I only play my dirty folk ditties now and then now, because it makes me sad to play them, because there is too much history and *lack of wealth* surrounding them. I think I should have moved to London for a year, and maybe I still will. Have you ever seen their TV shows? They're hilarious. I sang "My Pu$$y Is Magic" on a pilot for Channel 4 in London. It was one of the best feelings I've ever had.

But I didn't move to London, I stayed at America, and now I'm playing tonight at Googie's Lounge at 8:30.

I'm working on a new album, it's taken me a long time because it's supposed to be more main stream yet I am clinging to my "dirty folk rock" style for some childish reason. Perhaps it's because it's just fun to write songs about vaginas. Try it, I bet you'll like it. So now, I'm trying to find a way to marry the two genres of filth and family friendly -- main stream and songs about vaginas. It's not an easy task.

I just want so bad for my new song, "Tampons For Fingers" to play on MTV and I have fantasies of singing it at the VMAs and getting a Grammy for it. But the world is just not there yet, and especially not America. Gad demmet, why can't more people just love songs about vaginas?

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